Advice from the right person at the right moment may completely transform your life. Finding the appropriate person to offer you the proper counsel, on the other hand, isn't always easy—because you have to first figure out who to ask, what you want to know, and how to actually obtain a chance to ask this person.
There are really only two types of people in the world: those who will help you and those who won't. Some people refuse to believe that they can provide assistance because they think it's something that only others can do for them. Others feel that if they tell someone their problems, they'll just be burdened with more responsibility. Still others are simply too proud to admit that they need help.
But no matter why or how they act, there are certain people in your life who will always be willing to give you advice. These are the people we call mentors. They might not realize it, but they're actually giving you guidance by helping you find your own path through life. Whether you seek out mentors directly or not, they will always be available to you.
Perhaps you have a buddy who is about to make a huge life choice. Maybe you're a manager attempting to coach an employee. You will very certainly be sought for guidance on several times. There is an art to understanding when and how to provide counsel. Take some time to think about whether it's suitable to speak out. If you decide to offer your opinion, be sure to do so respectfully.
If you feel like giving advice often, then perhaps you should consider consulting a professional first. However, if you believe that you have skills that would benefit another person, then by all means share your knowledge!
The best way to understand when it's appropriate to give advice is by thinking about what type of relationship you have with the person you are advising. If they are close friends or family members, then you should refrain from offering any kind of opinion because it could potentially damage the relationship.
As mentioned earlier, managers are in the business of coaching their employees. This is usually done over time as a team member gains experience and learns from their mistakes. Although occasional tips are acceptable during this process, frank discussions about deficiencies within the employee's work performance should be avoided until after a certain period of time has passed. This is because it could cause the employee to lose confidence in the manager.
In general, avoid giving advice to friends or family members because it can create problems down the road.
Often, when someone asks for advise, they aren't looking for anything new. They're only searching for confirmation or reinforcement of a decision they've already made. That is an issue. When someone seeks the opinion of another, they generally have two questions in mind: 1 will this help me move forward? 2 are there any risks involved in doing this/going down this road?
Asking for advice can be difficult because we don't want to appear needy or desperate. We worry that if we ask for help, then we must also be able to give help in return. This isn't true. Just like you wouldn't give a sick person your blood, neither should you give away your power by needing others' advice or judgment. You deserve to be treated with respect even if you ask for help. Asking for advice is an important part of growth and maturity; it shows you're willing to learn from others and use what you know to better yourself.
These types of questions are fine as long as you're not trying to get others to make decisions for you.
Unsolicited advise providers often have no idea what your circumstance is like. Individuals who provide good counsel are those who are aware of all that has occurred and who attentively listen to you before providing recommendations. In most cases, they will ask whether you want guidance first. If you say yes, then they will explain their rationale as to why something they suggest would be beneficial for you.
They will also likely tell you how they can help or point you in the direction of other resources if they think it might be useful. The best advisers will not give up once they have found a way into your life; they will continue to look for ways to serve you even after the initial problem has been resolved.
Advisers who do not have this quality are usually only interested in themselves or their own ideas about what would make them happy. They may try to force their opinions on you even if you do not want them. These types of people often try to control others by making them feel guilty if they do not agree with their views. They expect you to fall in line with their thinking no matter how difficult that might be for you to do.
Advisors who act like this are not looking out for your best interests; they are trying to use you as a tool to satisfy their needs. It is important to understand this about someone before you agree to work with them or allow them to guide you through a situation.