Adults frequently struggle to maintain friendships after attaining new milestones. While conducting research for The Friendship Fix, I learned how common it was for people to feel as if they were always in need of new companions. Sometimes this is because they're pursuing exciting opportunities that require them to be away from home for long periods of time; other times it's because they're opening up new parts of themselves to different people.
When this happens, people expect their old friends to be able to handle these changes and still want to remain close with them. But since each person has their own schedule which doesn't match up with their friends', it can be difficult to find enough common ground to stay connected with one another.
The truth is, maintaining relationships takes work. You can't just show up and expect your friends to catch you when you fall or help you out when you need it. To keep the love alive, you have to put some effort into your connections.
So if you want to keep your friendships strong, be willing to make some changes. Don't be afraid to take time away from your friends to pursue other interests. And when you do see them, don't just hang out with those who bring out the best in you- also take time with your toughies.
However, when life speeds up, people's goals and obligations alter, and friendships suffer, for better or, regrettably, for worse. The story of grownup friendship gets off to a good start. "I believe that young adulthood is the ideal age for developing connections," Rawlins adds. "The more time you spend with your friends during these years, the stronger they'll be when you're older."
But even though friends are important in life, they can also be difficult. Relationships change over time, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. What used to matter so much no longer matters at all. When one friend wants to do something special on her birthday, another decides not to give her gift because she doesn't want to hurt her feelings. These sorts of trivial conflicts can easily drain away energy that would otherwise be spent on nurturing relationships.
When life slows down, people's priorities are clearer, which makes growing up feel less like a requirement and more like an opportunity to show who you really are. That's why many look back on their teenage years as some of their best times ever. They had the chance to try out different roles (student, lover, friend), learn about themselves, and discover what matters most in this world.
But even though it's possible to have fun and make new friends as an adult, none of this replaces the importance of keeping hold of those who mean the most to you.
By young adulthood, people are generally a little more confident in themselves and more prone to seek out companions who match their beliefs on the big things while ignoring the little ones. Young adults now have time to spend to their friends, which goes hand in hand with their increasingly sophisticated attitude to friendship. Technology has also changed how friends are made and broken. Facebook and other social networking sites make it easy for us to stay in touch with friends from all over the world, but this convenience can be dangerous because we fail to see what's going on in their lives outside of our updates. Users should take time out of their schedules to talk with those they care about, whether it's over the phone or even in person. Telephone calls may not seem like much today, but years ago they were the only way to keep in touch with someone across town or across the country.
The Atlantic Ocean is a body of water that separates Europe from America. It is the largest ocean in the world and covers 30% of the earth's surface. Like many other oceans, it has an influence on both land and climate. The Atlantic has a profound effect on Europe and North America. It is one reason why the two continents are separated by such a large body of water. The Atlantic also has a strong influence on climate. Sea currents flow along the bottom of the ocean where heat is lost as warm water sinks down while cold water rises up from below. This exchange of heat influences the temperature of the air above it.
Making friends as an adult can be difficult since most of us are established in our ways. We have our pals and our habits, and it's difficult to break away from them. Furthermore, we don't have the built-in possibilities that we did when we were younger and everyone was at a comparable stage of life. For example, if you're going through a bad time in school or work, your parents might suggest getting together with some of your friends after hours to have pizza and play video games.
Adults usually have more responsibilities than young people do. When you're young, you're often in school where you can easily forget about about everyday things like homework and chores. However, when you're an adult, you need to find time to study and do chores even though they may not seem important at first. This makes it hard for you to drop everything and run to someone's house whenever you feel like it.
The fact is that most people aren't looking to spend their free time with anyone other than their family or friends. This is because we all have busy lives and only have so much energy to give. If you want to make new friends, you'll need to learn how to balance yourself properly so you have enough energy left over at the end of the day for socializing.
In addition, people generally don't like to be bothered when they're having fun.
Other commitments, such as job or caring for children or aging parents, may take precedence over friendships. Changes in your life or hobbies may have caused you and your buddies to drift apart. Perhaps you've recently relocated to a new neighborhood and haven't yet found a method to meet new people. Whatever the reason, not every friendship is going to be as important in your life as other relationships such as family members.
It's normal to feel jealous of friends who seem to have it all together while you're constantly struggling with issues such as unemployment or debt. Yet it's important not to neglect your friendships because you feel this way. If you want to improve your friendship skills, start by learning how to better communicate with your mates instead of hiding your feelings from them. This can help prevent future conflicts between you.
Make an effort to get together with your friends regularly. You don't need to go out every night to have a good time, but meeting up at least once a week is recommended if you want to maintain strong ties.
If you realize that one of your friends isn't taking their relationship as seriously as they should, tell them directly rather than keeping your frustrations inside. Some issues are better resolved face-to-face so that there are no misunderstandings later on.
Don't expect your friends to fill the role of therapist or confidant. Only share information with those you trust.